Everybody Needs an Uncle Pat

I became an uncle six years ago, and Uncle Pat has always been my template for uncling. Because everyone needs an Uncle Pat. Someone to remember them on their birthdays, buy them Slurpees, ask about their lives, and drive them around on special journeys. If my nieces or future nephews ever have anything positive to say about their Uncle Tom, it will be because Uncle Pat showed me how to uncle well.

#TENTSgiving!!

I camped out in my parents’ lakehouse backyard this Thanksgiving (because of course I did). Huge thanks to my special helper Madelyn and for my entire family for supporting my dreams to super stardom as I got interviewed by The New York Times for this. Hahahaha. #TENTSgiving was a smashing success!

Coming Out to Myself – 14 Years Later

It’s LGBT+ History Month, and October 11th is National Coming Out Day. After pondering this video idea for a few years, now felt like the right time to relive my first coming out – by re-reading the journal entry I wrote at 19 on a raw, tragic night in 2006. I hadn’t looked at these words in 14 years. T’was the night I came out to myself and to God: a same-sex attracted or gay or queer Christian. Soon after this, I’d come out to my parents too.

‘Twas the Night Before Treatment

Tomorrow morning, bright and early, I set out on a new quest. A new quest within an already new journey of the last couple months – this unforeseen journey with an autoimmune disease. Tomorrow begins this new quest for healing and recovery. Remission. Or so I hope.

A Time to Refrain from Embracing

Looking down at my precious niece in my arms, I realized it’s really something, how we need physical touch to survive. Need to be swaddled. Need to be held. Need to feel the warmth of another human emanating against us, if only to affirm to one another we are not alone in this desert. To embrace for my soul or not to embrace for my body? Life with an autoimmune disease during the pandemic of the century: one calculated risk after another.

Back Home to Pennsylvania With My Brother!

I returned to my homeland of Langhorne, PA this Christmas, joining my brother Andy along the way. We ventured to Philadelphia for a day, walked around our old neighborhood, and otherwise enjoyed our history with this place. It was my first trip back north since my grandfather passed away last summer. This is life: the new and the old and everything in between.

My Name on a Stone

I traveled to Pennsylvania for Christmas, my first trip there since Ahh died this summer. My grandfather’s gravestone wasn’t chiseled until just recently, so this was my first time visiting it. Seeing it. It was the first time I’d ever seen my name on a stone.

This Hurts

Holidays are sneakily hard on me. I have a good family. A great one, even. I am a blessed guy. And yet the holidays attack me from both sides: reminders of a past drifting further away and a future growing more realized.

Old Life and New Life and the Life in Between

My grandfather celebrated his ninetieth birthday last month. Family from coast to coast — West to East and North to South — converged upon Langhorne, Pennsylvania for our biggest family celebration since my grandparents’ fiftieth wedding anniversary in 1998. A lot’s happened in the last two decades. I’ve written previously about the one I call […]

To My Little Sister, Now a Married Woman

I always knew this day would come. Of the three of us, I always knew you’d be first. You’re too beautiful, hilarious, sweet, and sincere. You love God, and you love people. You love Star Wars. How could a guy not want to spend the rest of his life with you? Your wedding day was among my most memorable […]

My Brother Said He Loves Me

I’ve returned to the addicts group. It’s the first time in five shifts that I’ve reunited with a group, and it’s already made for a smoother integration. For this familiarity to occur with the oldest, previously most intimidating group full of mustaches and patchy beards is a welcome surprise. I’ve teamed back up with 18-year-old Matt, the “bad twin” who also has […]

Why I Moved to Charlotte and Why I’m Freaking Out

Last weekend, I concluded my nine-month road trip with one final adventure to the Smokies. It was a gorgeous time. It was a torturous time. It was a sleepy solitary much needed recharging time. That cabin in the Smokies was a distraction-free arena to determine my post-journey existence. After nine long months on the road, I’d narrowed down my next chapter to three cities. Three […]

I Might Have Joined a Cult for 24 Hours

[A]s we pushed off the dock and the other guys got into their boats and pressed off, we back-paddled into the dark of the inlet, waving at the Goffs as they waved back at us. And then to our amazement, we saw all of them, fully dressed with shoes and jackets, take three steps together […]

On Weddings and Wanderings for 80 Days

I just returned from a week-long trek to south Florida. No, I didn’t drive there from Denver; I flew. Last week, #RunningTo morphed into #FlyingTo as I reunited with family for a wedding. This on the heels of my friend’s Denver wedding the weekend before. Two weddings in a seven-day stretch: one in the shadow of the […]

Why I Want an Older Brother

I’ve been blessed by a fantastic family. I love my parents, and I adore my two siblings. One has flown overseas multiple times for missions work, and the other has found a natural niche in youth ministry. They are my younger siblings, and they are my heroes. I am the oldest Zuniga kid (adult?), and […]