On the Fullerton Homeless Man Killed by Police

I don’t usually comment on current events. It’s tedious and tiresome and often prone to conflicting opinions. But one particular current event has captured my attention and the attention of an entire nation, and I feel the need to say something.

In 2011, a homeless man named Kelly Thomas was brutally beaten by police despite bearing no weapons and committing no crime.

Five days later, Thomas died from his injuries.

Over two years later, just a couple days ago, the now-former police officers charged with this homeless man’s murder were acquitted.

I suppose this story would have grabbed my attention no matter where it occurred. But the reason it seizes so much of my soul as I write from my favorite coffee shop is that all of these events, all of these people, all of this tragic story stem from the city where I write this post, the very city I adoringly call home:

Fullerton, California.

I used to say I could look out my window and tell people I see the Disneyland fireworks go off every night at 9:30pm, sharp.

Now, I look out my window and witness fireworks of an entirely other sort: protests over this spark-plug event of which the entire world is now aware.

It’s eerie, I tell you. I actually live right down the street from the Fullerton police department, the site of some loud and ongoing protests these last few days. It’s just bizarre to look out my apartment window and witness the scene so many others are seeing through smaller screens the world over.

My close proximity to the whole situation makes it seem more real.

You see, I’ve had many interactions with the Fullerton homeless population these last few years. Both positive and negative encounters alike. So, this whole hard story of the Fullerton homeless man killed by two of “Fullerton’s finest” stirs me in complicating personal ways.

This post won’t accuse the police of going too far, and it won’t rant about homelessness in Fullerton and the nation over.

This post is simply meant to ponder one thing aloud:

What do I do?

Should I be protesting alongside these angry people? Should I be angry with them?

Should I be telling these protesters to stop? Should I be angry at them?

What should I be doing right now? I should be doing…something. Right?

I don’t know, I guess I’ve rarely been one to “take action.” Certainly in a political/protest context, but even in other “normal” matters of life. I’ve long struggled to take action in relationships, and I’ve wrestled with issues like shame and pornography for months and years before finally taking action.

I’m a generally passive person, gradually growing “active” by taking more initiative in my relationships and tackling other struggles. It’s been an excruciating 26-year journey of growth, but I’m plodding forward, one difficult conversation at a time.

Alas, this Fullerton story admittedly leaves me confused and sad and wondering how this city I adore will move forward. How I’ll act and react should I encounter a homeless person, a protester, a police officer in the days and weeks to come.

If you guys think of us today, please pray for Fullerton. Pray for the policemen of this city, pray for the homeless, and pray for the poor families on both sides of this story.

Above all, pray for peace.

Pray for peace.